The Things That Go Through My Head On A Daily Basis

So the title may seem odd but what i mean by it is the conversations or thoughts i share with my unborn son, Scott. I am finally in that stage where I can feel this little boy move. And move a lot might I add. And I'll be honest i get quite mad at him sometimes, but i still love him <3! They say it feels like "butterflies" or "bubbles". It's not that i don't believe them its just the idea of butterflies in my stomach....yea not so much. If butterflies felt painful I'd believe you because when I was young "butterflies" in your stomach felt nice...not the way I am about to explain it. You see I have already experienced the bubbles, it tickles a lot. But however my idea of what people call "butterflies" is way different than yours. To me it hurts like here's how the scene went:

Me: (laying on the bed talking on the phone)
friend: (carrying on the conversation about game characters)
Me: (screams in pain) "oh my god!" (if you were on the phone you would have heard a "thud")
Friend: "what??!?!? Are you alright???
Me: "Of course not! I feel like Sygorney Weaver in alien!"
Friend: (awkward silence) "....uhm why?"
Me: "My son won't stop moving and it feels like hes gonna pop out my stomach at any moment!"

So yes, i admit i compared my son to an alien. I'm sorry if that offends anyone but that is seriously how it felt. I know its apart of motherhood but geez...when he moves its like hes thinking.."Hmmm...which way should i hurt momma today?" or better yet "oooh! momma's in the grocery store! If she doesn't grab anything I like I'm gonna kick." I promise you that my boy plots on me while he sits there bored in my tummy. Especially at night! if I'm really tired he feels the need to break dance or practice soccer/football. So all I have to say to him is this, "YOU HAD BETTER LIKE SPORTS!" If not then all that kicking was just pure evil. I love him none the less. I just hope he likes sports or something creative. I was never into all that, I was a artsy band nerd >.< but honestly i think he'll do good in whatever he chooses. I just wish he was here already so I can hold him (and so he can stop torturing my muscles and bones...and of course my bladder.).