Just my thoughts...

I couldn't write this and not cry like a baby...You see back when you and i used to talk about having a baby, you sounded all excited and now that were actually pregnant things are way diffrent. You used to talk about how you would do this and that and I just dont see it. Its like everything you said and promised has gone out the window. Not saying youre doing anything wrong its just I thought youd be around a little more often once everything happened. I thought youd actually be here for all the special moments like when i found out the gender...I begged you to come but you had school. The first heartbeat you werent there. All the appointments you couldve been at, you missed. Like today...i really felt the first kick, like really felt it and you missed that too. It all just hurts because i thought youd be more involved. And what i dont understand is that i live with you and you miss so much. i dont understand why its like we are strangers just sleeping in the same bed, living in the same house. But yet you miss out on so much. Im not bitching or being hormonal i just wish you were here more. I understand that you have work and school but with the little time you are around or home...its like youre still not even here. I just wish youd stop missing out on the special moments...it doesnt feel good to experience them alone.